Wednesday, October 01, 2008

Examining The AL Playoffs Using The Always Sunny In Philadelphia Paragon Paradigm

It's not always wise to examines aspects of your life based on lessons levied in Always Sunny In Philadelphia. It could lead you drop acid whilst tailgating, date local rappers of questionable scholastic aptitude, or lie to your friends about having cancer.

However, there is one lesson that can be applied to a real life scenario; The Always Sunny/Ghostbusters Paradigm. Take a look at how it plays into the American League Playoff Scenario:

The Brains/The Muscle: The Los Angeles Angels Of Anaheim:

Their lineup is a combination of brute force and savvy situational hitting. Scioscia and Artie Moreno constructed a great team and added even more power by trading for Teixeira even while up 13 games on the competition. Not sure how they'd do with a samurai sword.

The Looks: Tampa Bay Rays:

Young, fast and a sexy pick. Not quite as prone to pop their shirt off as, say, the Brewers (or Rex), but they have a bird that won't quit. Additionally, their stadium looks like a nipple.

The Girl Who Does Nothing: The Chicago White Sox

Substitute "Chicago White Sox" for "Sweet Dee" in all of the episode titles. Nothing really changes. The Chicago White Sox Date A Retarded Guy? I'd buy it. Frank Sets The Chicago White Sox On Fire? Seems reasonable. Enjoy Tampa.

Wild Card: The Boston Red Sox

For literal and figurative reasons, the Boston Red Sox are absolutely capable of anything. They could rattle off 11 straight wins or get swept. I would not be surprised by either. As long as they don't cut the brakes of the bandwagon while trying to Feeeeeeeeeeeeel You Up. Wild Card Bitches

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