Hey, there's a party over here and over there, and they're serving Budweiser at both of them. I'll stay home.
They mentioned before the game that Ohio State has 3 players who are married. The propensity of football players being married has always baffled me. I mean, in college I knew a grand total of 0 married people. Actually, I think the weird 37 year old chick in my public speaking class was married, but that's it. There must be something more to this. Are the players actually way older? Are the girls only marrying them because they know they're with a meal ticket? If I were Bill Simmons, I'd be calling for a Bob Ley investigation. But I'm not, and I won't.
Wow, Troy Smith sucks. 1-8 on 3rd down, averaging 2nd an 8. The O-line is blocking terribly. OSU's punting from their end zone, and it looks like that glass football (which always seemed too fragile) is firmly entrenched in that southern cesspool of strip malls, Gainesville.
Tim Tebow is unstoppable. Everytime he gets it outside of the red zone, you know it's going to be a run up the middle, but it always goes for 4+ yards. Thom Brennaman just said, "Stripping the ball from Tebow is like stripping the ball from King Kong". I'm sure Fay Wray would appreciate that.
Touchdown King Kong. 41-14
Ohio State was undoubtebly the best team all year. Now, after not playing for 2 fucking months, they come out rusty and get blown out. Are they a victim of the system? I think so.
OSU has 84 yards of offense. They gained more than that in the first :16 of the game.
Not until 9:49 left of the 4th quarter do they mention that UF has the chance to be the first reigning football and basketball champs. Somewhere, Joakim Noa is being ugly.
Woohoo, 1st down Gators. At this point I'm rooting for the game to end so I can go home.
Florida's defense has created a "Unity Chain" which a member wears. That's cute, I guess. I think pre-school's do the same thing so they don't lose any kids.
I'm losing steam (whether or not I ever had any is debatable). I almost wrote, Urban Meyer is a stupid name". Hey loook, I just did.
Game OVAH. Jett Jackson and the Florida Gators win!
Congrats, time to go to work, and more importantly go to sleep.