Monday, January 08, 2007

Pregame and 1st Quarter

Hey everybody, this thing's almost ready to kick off and so am I. I'm
joined by a Diet Coke, 7 tired coworkers, a Pilgrim Sandwich, and
transcripts of Bill Simmons' last 150 running diaries. Not really.

For those of you unfamiliar with Live Blogs (Mom), here's how it'll work.
I'll separate each quarter into separate posts (and if there's an Overtime I'll finish the blog on my suicide note). Every few minutes refresh the page and there will (possibly) be a smarmy comment by me on something (hopefully) relating to the game.

A great moment in the pregame show, hosted by the wildly obnoxious Chris Rose. Rose, flanked by Emmitt Smith and Eddie George, asked who had the faster running backs, the SEC or the Big 10. George said, "The Big Ten". Smith countered by saying, "Yeah, but who's got the more durable ones?" Ouch. George playfully smacked Smith, but was probably crying inside.

Ah, the Florida Marching Band. Florida has the most obnoxious fight song ever. During a trip to Gainesville accompanying the Hofstra softball team, I was privvy to hear that over and over and over and over again. It never leaves your head.

We were treated to two packages about the team's respective quarterbacks. Heisman trophy winner Troy Smith and Florida's Chris Leak. They were both, basically, the same except Leak's was set to My Chemical Romance and Smith's to U2. I thought that was interesting, but I have no idea why.

Eddie George says it's like a home game with 75% of the crowd supporting OSU. People want to get out of Columbus, Ohio in January?! I'm shocked!

Ohio State's band is called "The Best Damn Band In The Land". Fuck that. They should let Thom Yorke dot the 'i'.

The promos for the band show the two teams climbing a ladder for the BCS crown. I think a more adequate depiction of the BCS system would show all of the teams getting on an AMTRAK train from Boston to New York and being given tickets to their destination. Oh, sorry Michigan. Did you think you were going to Penn Station? That's cute. Have fun in Norwalk, motherfucker.

(Did you like that burn, Bowl Championship Series?)

Eddie George says that for Ohio State to win they need to win the turnover battle AND not turn the ball over. Thanks, Eddie.

Looks like it's a neck and neck battle between "Alpha Dog" and "Primeval" for most promoted movie. Alpha Dog looks pretty awesome and I can't wait to see it. Primeval is a horror movie about an alligator. Rentaaaaallll.

This game is being played at The University of Phoenix Stadium. I once saw a car with a University of Phoenix sticker on the rear window. I think more collegiate games should be played in places sponsored by fake schools. C'mon Devry, make it happen. Or, what if Florida State played in the ITT Tech Bowl? Who has the better degree?

Where is Colonel Bud Day? Have you seen him?

Remember for the 2008 election, Floridians, John McCain won you the coin toss.

Ted Ginn scored on the opening kickoff of the game. Holy shit! Finally after 2 seaons worth of Ginn fluffing he does something insanely exciting at an important moment.

Chris Leak looks like "The Famous Jett Jackson" of Disney Channel fame. Yeah, I went there.

Tim Tebow rules. Every video game portrayal of myself I've ever created has unknowingly been a duplicate of Tebow. Speaking of video games, in last nights MSU-Mich. battle in NCAA 07, I let up a kickoff for a TD to Michigan and lost 48-21. Auspicious for the Gators.

Maybe not! Chris Leak threw a lob into a soft zone for a TD. 7-7!

Well, there's going to be some defense played after all. That's nice. 3 and out for the first OSU drive. UF should have really good field position.

OSU's defense looks really rusty. Maybe the 50+ days off affected them.

Touchdown on an option. UF's rushing game was non existent this season and they've been able to gash OSU pretty well everytime they've tried.

Another good return, this one by Anthony Tony Gonzalez. OSU needs a solid drive here. Not necessarily a TD. But their D has looked terrible and can't give up good field position.

Not a good sequence of events for either team. Ted Ginn is walking to the locker room with a foot injury, Smith got sacked for a major loss, now UF's Harvey is down.

Troy Smith throws a pick to Reggie Lewis on 3rd and 14. Wow. OSU looks terrible, special teams notwithstanding.


Anonymous said...


Jonathan Singer said...

Ginn just owned Florida

Anonymous said...

Go whiter black guy.

kv said...

There needs to be more famous jet jackson references in my daily life. Thanks for reminding me of that.

Mom said...

I know it's inappropriate for mothers to read blogs, but thanks for the shout out anyhow!!!