Thursday, October 05, 2006

"You're With Me, Corduroy" just doesn't sound as good

Recently I found myself wildly intoxicated with a group of guy friends at a late hour. As the night was winding down, the same thing happened as all the other times I've been wildly intoxicated with a group of guy friends (or even guy acquantances) at a late hour. Someone said, "Let's go to a strip club".

Now, if you're a woman, or a Mormon, you may not know how the rest of the scenario plays out. Usually there's about 2-3 minutes of earnest excitement because, folks, you and your friends are drunk and you're going to get drunker at a strip club. Then the next 2 minutes include logistic discussions that tend to put a shadow of doubt over the following excursion (including, but not limited to, not knowing where the nearest strip club is) . Following that the strip club journey grinds to a halt and instead shifts to finding a Wendy's or a diner (if you're on Long Island).

The strip club journey never comes to fruition unless you're in a place where you're supposed to go to a strip club, like Las Vegas or Montreal, QC, Canada. Most drunkard tend to realize that either they have a girlfriend and this would be immoral, or they have no money and this would be fiscally irresponsible (or both!).

My reasons at never wanting to go are different, however. It's all about the music. Believe it or not, at strip clubs all the music is censored. That's right, you can see naked women, but you have to listen to the radio edit of Godsmack's "Moonbaby" while you do it. And that is just one reason why this world is fucking crazy sometimes.

YouTube Clip of The Day

Speaking of debauchery, it's everyone's favorite web savvy GOP'er, Mark Foley! (note - Matt Foley lives in a van down by the river, Mark Foley aspires to take boys to a van down by the river [or anywhere, it's not really important as long as it's close to Congress])

If you've been living under a rock, Mark Foley is basically the gay, Republican, pedophile version of Bill Clinton who was sending inappropriate IM's to 16 year old pages. Above are those IM cenversations acted out.

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